Wednesday, February 4, 2009

134

How do you tell a 3 1/2 year old why his mommy and daddy don't live together. We have been saying that we just don't play together. His new question WHY? It really caught me off guard for some reason tonight. I think it is because i really don't know what changed in her.

3 comments:

Shadow said...

oh this is sad.... but remember he's little. answer the quest directly, as short as possible, as honestly as you can...

Banana Girl said...

Even a 3 year old can understand that people still love each other but don't like each other...Tell him the truth with words he knows. He will get it. But you don't have to make it his trauma. And it doesn't have to be blaming or shaming. He is probably asking to make sure it was not his fault. But one thing for sure, you and your wife should do it together. It might break open a door for the two of you in looking at him as a primary purpose in the near term. He is little, but he is old enough to know the difference between safe and not safe, together and alone, love and anger. I think the motive for the question will dictate the answer. But like the program, just keep it simple and tell the truth. He will understand. He will feel the love and know you will always be there for him. Funny how God sends the message through a little messenger with a question.

Wait. What? said...

WOW. I think the reason the question is so hard is the age of your child, how much they will really understand and how much really needs to be said.

I know if it were me I guess I would work on a way to be as genuine as possible in my answer.

I wish you the very best in your search for the right answer for her.

Cat