Saturday, March 28, 2009

186 days

I picked up my 6 month chip today. My son went with me, he goes for the chocolate donut. I just love having him there, one of the two people who mean the most to me. Things have been good this past week. Nothing big to blog about, maybe that's a good thing.

Monday, March 23, 2009

six months

Well today is six months. As one guy in my meeting says "that's a long time between cocktails." There have been times that i miss it, like hanging with the guys or out with the wife. But for me one beer is really a six or a 12 pack. That's just a life i do not want to go back to, i have been such a happier person without it. I know what i lose if i go down that road again. First i would lose me then my wife and son and that is a road i can't go back down. So when those thoughts go through this brain of mine all i need to do is think of them and of me. I was so unhappy without them(see all post before mid February) seeing there loving faces, holding them and laughing with them. I can't lose all of that again and make it back down the good road that I'm on. There will be more urges but i just need to think through the drink and i will be fine. The hurt i would put us through out weighs any drink. I do love my family so much, this is where i belong. And where i need to stay.

Stay sober out there and be happy.

Thursday, March 19, 2009

so little time 177 days

Where does my day go, is there time for everything. Yes date night, we went to one of the top restaurants in Denver called Vesta Dipping Grill (i went to school with the chef). The food was amazing my friend he would just keep sending things out we ordered a appetiser he sent 3 out. The dessert was very cool he made flour less chocolate cake with a moues center and a marang cookies cut out like the phantom mask. The play was super cool i have never been, that would of meant getting off the couch and doing something this drunk didn't think he would like. I was flat out amazed how much fun it was and she had in her own words " That was the best date i have ever been on." I told her she needs to plan the next one for next month and it does not have to be this fancy. So things are going pretty well she must of said thank you 30-40 times over the weekend. I will make time to catch up with all of you because this blog is still super important to me.

Wednesday, March 11, 2009

169 days

Things seem to be going well at home. We had a hard talk about going out with friends when we where "single" it was go out when ever we wanted. Now priorities should be family, us then our friends. We will work things out. This weekend I'm taking her out for a night out on the town. Doing things that i would not do when i was drinking because it was easier to hide at home. I have worked pretty hard on this night and it is not a cheap night.I will post to let you know how it goes.

I still hope for the best for us and our son.

Thursday, March 5, 2009

fear 163 days

The problems of my former life of drinking keep popping up. My wife still has a lot of fear about me and us. I know it has only been a week and a half of living together but fear will destroy all. I have learned this the hard way, i want this to work and she says she does too. She says that she is happy but full of fear. She says i need to stay consistent and that's what I'm doing. For now it's back to work.

I still have hope for us.

Sunday, March 1, 2009

Sunday 159 days

I do hate going so long with out blogging. So i picked up my 5 month chip on Friday and brought a new guy to my morning meeting. It was also the first time i was able to meet him. He is going to fit in very well with our group, funny how our therapist hooked us up. We our both going through the same things and way to much a like. I thought i was the only one just kidding(me trying to be funny with out my morning caffeine). Last night i gave my 4 month chip to a very good friend who said he needed the serenity prayer. Small thing like that really seem to matter to me now. Maybe this growing up stuff is not that hard after all. Open, willing and honest is how i want to live my life from now on. It does seem a lot easier then trying to remember all the bullshit. Well I'm off to make breakfast for the family, hope you all have a great day and as banana girl always says DON'T DRINK TODAY.